Friday, October 24, 2008

...sleepless nights, sleepless days, my sleepless life.

I took a deep breath and relaxed. Damn, it feels good to relax; I am so gonna love it.
It's dead quiet.
- What a beautiful sky. Look up; lots of hopeful clouds in mine..ahh, it ain't help
- Her skin is so smooth and warm. God, the woman I love is resting in my arms..ahh, it ain't help either
- My father used to blame me all the time...No, No, No, Don't! That's not the stuff you wanna think about. Think of something else...
- The autumn Kalas are finally here, pure and gentle. Can you smell it? It's like a virgin.....don't be stupid, it's the smell of Giorgio Armani men's mixed with Versace women's!....ahh, it didn't help either.

Damn! What's wrong with me tonight? Why can I not just sleep? It's way past midnight already.
I opened my eyes...

The ceiling is still dark. The bedroom is dark and quiet. My home is all dark and quiet. I don't wanna think my life is all dark and quiet. I just don't want to...

Listen! I can hear the cars tires' sound on the wet street. It has started raining since I went to bed. The dim reflections of the cars' light on my bedrooms' ceiling caught my eye. They march gently and then fade.

Where do all these people go when I'm asleep? I am so jeelous. I just wanna go with any of them. No matter where; I just need to go. I don't wanna spend the next half of my life asleep.

I don't know where they go, but I know where they don't go. They don't go towards big dreams. They don't probably either go towards fancy dreams. That's what has been stoping all my life. Where they go is towards simple little funs, sensible and tangible.

The dim lights on the ceiling come and go, they come and go. I found it. You know what I needed to do night?

I needed to be holding a class of Whiskey filled with shiny ice cubs. God, also a damn good Cuban cigar. It's simple; your your imagination again.

Ahhhh! What a relief; the whiskey is so good. Cold and bitter! The cigar smells like heaven. It goes deep into my soul. I feel so light. You know what I am doing now? Staring at the smoke. Join me; it's so fun. There are several shapes in it. They come and go. Each evolve to another, as if they are on a broadway stage playing a screenplay.

I am getting a little dizzy. Look at this nude. Is she not hot? The cigar has turned so maculine. What an spectacular erotic scene they have created before my eyes.

The darkness seems to have been fading to the background of what I am witnessing. I feel so much better. You know what is still missing? A light music! Let's imagine I, my whiskey and my cigar get enclosed by a Jazz Bar. Wow! What a comfortable space! I love the faint red lights. This space so touching me. Let's give up for tonight's one and only Mr. Smooth Jazz!

I close my eyes and let my soul soar with the music to the boundaries I have never exceeded. How do these boundaries appear anyway? Who creates them?

I don't want to go to sleep anymore. I wanna stay awake and render my sleepless life for ever.

This is a farewell and also a start.